Cayenne wrote:I don't disagree that there are other things... however I was under the impression that this particular discussion was about porn. I didn't realize I had to qualify every statement I made. It becomes tedious to have a discussion. Please understand I'm not meaning this as an attack. I'm frustrated that a simple comment meaning to convey the depth of my pain resulted in what can be read above. I never intended to bring up alternate meanings of the marriage vow, stone throwing, levels of sin, what hurts more than other things, forgiveness, etc.
I am guessing my words have felt directed at you, and they aren't intended to be, necessarily. I say to any and all, if the shoe doesn't fit, don't wear it. But if the Spirit is doing any convicting, don't ignore it. I did ask you and Learning1 a direct question, which neither want to answer, to understand deeper into a topic. I, too, felt it was necessary to share that though there are wives who can totally relate to your experience and feel exactly as you do/did, there are also wives like me, with a different experience and different feelings. I did not take my husband's sin as there was a problem with me. It was his, and his to own. I never felt "ugly" because of it. I never felt, and still don't feel like my husband's porn use, and even beyond that to some sexually addictive behavior he acted out on, was "adultery" as in the sense that Jesus gives as the one reason for divorce (and I know there are differing opinions on that). He did not join his body, to another, ever.