sounds like you guys are making great progress!
I would say overall, relax and enjoy this season of your married lives, when you have each other and are learning to pleasure one another. Maybe I'm reading into this, but I want to caution you to make sure that you're really listening to what she
wants, overall and in each sex session, that you're not just trying to even up the orgasm ratio without paying attention to her deep needs for intimacy, too. In other words, make sure she doesn't feel like an engineering problem.
As for the size thing, we had that too.
Had difficulties with it until she had her first baby. You guys are already ahead of the curve where we were regarding PIV by this point in our marriage, so congrats! Agreed, lube helps a lot, plus just going slow and letting her control penetration.
Learning to orgasm with another person's stimulation is tricky at first. Sounds like you guys are learning what makes each other work, what turns each other on. You'll get better and better at it. If she had a past where she could get to orgasm quickly (again, sounds like us--my wife has always been quick on the trigger, so to speak) then you'll probably reach a point where you can do that or something similar together in a similar amount of time. We've been married for 17 years now, and if I want, I can get her to orgasm in a couple of minutes if she's aroused enough beforehand or it's been a while since her last O. Also, orgasm during PIV alone without much other stimulation is also possible for us, if we take the time (with six kids, we just don't often have that kind of time, though
) Multiple O's have always been tricky for us--until relatively recently, she was a one and done kind of gal. Nowadays, she's finally figured out how to get to multiples. We've just sort of let it happen in its own course.
Enjoy your marriage bed and congrats on your new marriage! You guys have wonderful days ahead of you!