Drive & function crashes at night?

Erectile disfunction, premature ejaculation, delayed orgasm, etc.
justsomeguy
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Drive & function crashes at night?

Postby justsomeguy » Fri Aug 18, 2017 1:00 pm

Hi folks,

I'm on TRT with Defy since early this year. Recent labs show me at good levels for T and E. I'm 48 and fit, fairly low body fat. Normally experience erections in my sleep & morning wood, so this tells me my hormone levels & hardware are ok.

What I just can't understand is while my drive & ability are strong in the morning and afternoon, it all comes crashing down at night. Yesterday I kept thinking of a particular sexual act with my wife during the day. Come night, she was game. While I was chilling with her before hand talking about this, I had a decent erection. But come show time I was nothing but soft. Couldn't get a firm erection to save my life.

I am certain there are some psych issues involved as well. I think I've developed a phobia to any kind of discomfort in my wife - like if the position is slightly uncomfortable on her knees for example, if it's night then my whole system just shuts down (and that's what happened, amongst several small inconvenience type of things in getting positioned beforehand).

I feel like in the morning or afternoon my higher drive could have easily overcome my "issues" but for whatever reason, come night time, any negative thoughts or her reactions easily send my erection off the cliff. Is a sexual therapist my only option here?

Thanks all

tjw
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Re: Drive & function crashes at night?

Postby tjw » Fri Aug 18, 2017 1:17 pm

A sex therapist is probably your best option. But I'm not sure if this isn't just "normal", to some degree. You're absolutely right that higher drive can overcome inhibitions which become show stoppers in the absence of drive, when you're tired, or if something metabolic is unsatisfied.

ledgemoor
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Re: Drive & function crashes at night?

Postby ledgemoor » Fri Aug 18, 2017 2:00 pm

Performance is definitely better in the morning when testosterone is highest. Testosterone helps you perform in spite of negative factors. The lower your testosterone, the more ideal the conditions must be for it to happen.

What is your total testosterone reading? It typically needs to be upped as you age. Are you on injections?
Everything you ever wanted in life is just outside your comfort zone (Jamie Lee Curtis)

justsomeguy
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Re: Drive & function crashes at night?

Postby justsomeguy » Fri Aug 18, 2017 2:43 pm

On 6/30 T was at 973, E was at 25.6, DHEA was 371.1 (they have me on DHEA supplement), SHBG was 28.0.

I'm injecting T and HCG twice per week sub-q.

Of course, that was 48 days ago. I remember feeling awesome when that lab was pulled but now less so....

doug-h
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Re: Drive & function crashes at night?

Postby doug-h » Fri Aug 18, 2017 3:00 pm

Without stating the obvious, perhaps there is a good deal of fatigue mixed in there. Without knowing your employment, or even your sleep habits, it could be that you are physically depleted at the end of the day. Add that to a lower T level at night, and it starts stacking up.

I know that I am a lot more inclined to into snuggle sex mode in the evening, and save the more athletic endeavors for weekend morning's or afternoons.

justsomeguy
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Re: Drive & function crashes at night?

Postby justsomeguy » Fri Aug 18, 2017 3:22 pm

I did a group ride (cycle) for about 45 miles from 6-8p that day (yesterday). I felt strong on the ride and I wasn't feeling depleted afterwards but maybe I was. The other big factor I've noticed is the amount of time since I last had an O. In this case it had been 48 hours. Normally I am fully recharged after that length of time, and many times I'm ok even after 24 hours.

A few weeks ago I brought my wife to a trade show and we worked my booth together. It was crazy busy. On my feet all day with the dog & pony show. Then a long client dinner which included wine. Back at the hotel we did something similar and... it was great! No problem! My wife pointed out that I was on an emotional high and that prolly helped. But then we made love the first thing the next morning (not 8 hours later) and it was great again! Or did I experience the mysterious hotel sex effect??

The inconsistency is driving me nuts. I felt fairly awesome for a stretch of like 6 weeks and thought all was well with my regimen, but now I seem to have fallen off the rails again :|

doug-h
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Re: Drive & function crashes at night?

Postby doug-h » Fri Aug 18, 2017 3:44 pm

justsomeguy wrote:I did a group ride (cycle) for about 45 miles from 6-8p that day (yesterday). I felt strong on the ride and I wasn't feeling depleted afterwards but maybe I was.


I think you can be certain that 2 hours on a bike at that pace depleted you more than you realize, especially that late in the day. Blood sugar, electrolytes, hydration, etc, all need a little bit of time to return to normal. I know that road riding isn't quite as demanding as the same amount of time mountain biking, but I usually consume 2 liters of water in that time span, and still take several hours before I feel hydrated. Any hard climbs or sprints are going to deplete nutrients and electrolytes. 2 hours on a mountain bike, and I am ready for a beer, a pitcher of water and a nap.

justsomeguy
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Re: Drive & function crashes at night?

Postby justsomeguy » Fri Aug 18, 2017 10:19 pm

Well tonight everything was fine in the marriage bed (no ride today). Perhaps I need to come to grips with the reality that 48 is not 25 - even tho I feel 25 in my head :wink:

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Learning1
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Re: Drive & function crashes at night?

Postby Learning1 » Sat Aug 19, 2017 5:57 am

Not sure if you need a sex therapist. But if your wife is on board, probably can't hurt anything.

You seem very similar to my DH. It is always easier him in the AM. Sometimes at night the equipment doesn't work, especially if we have had a AM session or if he is fatigued, long stressful day at work. (49yrs old, really good shape, eats really healthy, so far only takes a multi-vitamin & drinks a gelatin/protein daily). He also will not engage in anything that will be painful or cause me discomfort. If he thinks he is causing me discomfort he will just stop. He does find ways to "fix" those areas, eg liberator pieces for positioning comfort, knows certain positions work better during certain time of the month, varies foreplay/seduction etc.
“I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else.” C.S. Lewis


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