Men who had a vasectomy, your thoughts please

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MidnightSparkle01
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Men who had a vasectomy, your thoughts please

Postby MidnightSparkle01 » Tue Apr 28, 2015 10:04 pm

DH and I have been prayerfully considering the right choice for permanent birth control for our family. I have a bone condition that will most likely worsen with each additional pregnancy and God has been speaking to us about adoption for some time. We've narrowed the possibilities down to vasectomy for him or Essure for me. We both have reservations about the latter. He said he will absolutely get a vasectomy if we decide it is the best choice, since I gave birth to our daughter. My questions are:
1. Do you regret having a vasectomy?

2. Does the pain eventually go away?

3. Is sex as good for you as it was before?

4. Have you found the procedure to be effective?

Any other advice, thoughts, or pointers? Thank you!

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Re: Men with vasectomies, your thoughts please

Postby TilWeHaveFaces » Wed Apr 29, 2015 6:07 am

My overall thoughts are that for men of a certain age, this is more or less a rite of passage. Most of my friends have been through it, and I have as well.

And yes, it's a bit embarrassing and uncomfortable, but the upside is that you have a readymade excuse to take painkillers and sit around watching sports for an entire weekend. (That is, if you're smart enough to schedule the procedure on a Friday before a big weekend of games. I got some good tips from my predecessors. :mrgreen: )

Answers to your questions in-line:

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:DH and I have been prayerfully considering the right choice for permanent birth control for our family. I have a bone condition that will most likely worsen with each additional pregnancy and God has been speaking to us about adoption for some time. We've narrowed the possibilities down to vasectomy for him or Essure for me. We both have reservations about the latter. He said he will absolutely get a vasectomy if we decide it is the best choice, since I gave birth to our daughter. My questions are:
1. Do you regret having a vasectomy?


Not at all. It is absolutely liberating not to have to track my wife's cycle (we did NFP) and I always hated condoms. Glad to be rid of them. Plus, we have four daughters, are both employed, and are in our mid-40s. It was time to shut down the production line. :wink:

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:2. Does the pain eventually go away?


Of course. It's a pretty minor procedure. (Somebody called it "the oil change of outpatient surgery." :lol: ) Maybe three days of soreness, then some discomfort, then you don't really think about it at all.

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:3. Is sex as good for you as it was before?


I've noticed absolutely no difference, other than not having to use a barrier method one week out of the month.

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:4. Have you found the procedure to be effective?


We don't have an off-the-charts sex life (uh, see my other threads) but it's been about three years now and no kids yet. :mrgreen:

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:Any other advice, thoughts, or pointers? Thank you!


The only thing to be sure of is if you're absolutely done having biological kids. (This was the hang-up for my DW, as she wasn't quite sure she was ready to really say "no more." And of course, after I was scheduled for the procedure but before the procedure date, we conceived DD4. Whoopsie. Well, we're definitely done now! :lol: )

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Re: Men with vasectomies, your thoughts please

Postby midwest guy » Wed Apr 29, 2015 6:18 am

1. Do you regret having a vasectomy? - No regrets at all. We were at the point in our lives where we did not care to have any more children, and vasectomy seemed to be the most reliable, long term solution.


2. Does the pain eventually go away? - Pain subsided over a short period of time. Never missed any time from work and other than a few stupid actions on my part, such as jumping out of bed of pickup three days following procedure, the pain never really caused any problems.


3. Is sex as good for you as it was before? - Would have to say it was better. Neither of us had to be concerned about birth control.


4. Have you found the procedure to be effective? - Very effective! After several lab tests, sperm count was zero,,,no sperm, no other birth control needed.

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Re: Men with vasectomies, your thoughts please

Postby mm » Wed Apr 29, 2015 7:23 am

I can answer from the unusual perspective of somebody has had two vasectomies. (See answer to question 4)

1. Regrets? No. We were sure were done having children, and that's important. We do have a friend who re-married and had the vasectomy reversed so that he and his new wife could have a biological child together. The reversal worked but my understanding is that it doesn't always. So that's a difficult conversation worth having--what if DH, God forbid, should become a widower?

2. Pain? I've had hernia surgery and an appendectomy. I have zero pain at either of those surgical sites today. The vasectomies were much less painful than either of those and the pain went away faster.

3. Sex? Much better because we don't have to worry about bc.

4. Effective? Yes. But. After the procedure the post test indicated "a large number of mobile sperm." I had the test done a couple of times. Dr. explained this happens sometimes and there can be a number of different reasons. So I had the procedure done a second time. This time the post test came back with a zero score. So my advice is always: Make sure you do the post test, and don't give up on bc until you get that zero score.
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Re: Men with vasectomies, your thoughts please

Postby George B. » Wed Apr 29, 2015 12:44 pm

1. Do you regret having a vasectomy?

Not at all. Not for a moment. We have six kids and are so glad to have them. Each one is absolutely a blessing from God. Yet, when it came time to stop having kids, God spoke to both my wife and I separately.

2. Does the pain eventually go away?

Yes, it goes away pretty quickly. For me, it was a few days of soreness and walking around gingerly, but nothing horrible. I was concerned that my first ejaculation would be painful, but it wasn't. Since then, no problems at all, pain-wise.

3. Is sex as good for you as it was before?

Absolutely. In some ways, it's gotten better, since there's no need to worry about birth control and getting pregnant. We can have sex whenever we want and it's just as pleasurable, if not more so. Ejaculation amount and sensation is exactly the same, as far as I can tell.

4. Have you found the procedure to be effective?

Yes, it has been effective so far. We're very fertile and have sex often, so we would know by now if it weren't effective. We also did the recommended two sperm sample tests, and I came out completely negative for live sperm on both.

Any other advice, thoughts, or pointers? Thank you!

I would make sure that you are both in agreement on this and have prayed through it. I would also recommend that you find a surgeon who's done a lot of these. My surgeon had done thousands and for him, it was no big deal.
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Re: Men with vasectomies, your thoughts please

Postby TilWeHaveFaces » Wed Apr 29, 2015 1:02 pm

Oh yeah, I should add that research shows most guys don't actually circle back for the post test. (And for 99% of them, it works out just fine.) But if you do this procedure, don't let your DH be one of them. If there are any issues with the procedure, it is far better to find out via a semen sample than via a pregnancy test, you know?

One procedural note: though the "gun" is no longer "being loaded" (as it were) after the procedure, you are still firing "live ammo" for awhile. The docs will tell your DH that he will need to ejaculate a certain number of times (50? 80?) before he can be considered infertile, and to use condoms until he comes back for the post-test.

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Re: Men with vasectomies, your thoughts please

Postby KyWildcat » Fri May 01, 2015 8:43 am

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:1. Do you regret having a vasectomy?

My only regret is delaying the decision. No, I do not regret having a vasectomy at all.
MidnightSparkle01 wrote:2. Does the pain eventually go away?

For the vast majority of people that have the procedure the pain is a short amount of time. It is important to follow the direction of the doctor to the letter. If your husband does manual labor he'll want to get several days or even a week off. If he has a desk job, two to three days off should be ok.
MidnightSparkle01 wrote:3. Is sex as good for you as it was before?

Better. No worries of pregnancy and no messing with other forms of BC.
MidnightSparkle01 wrote:4. Have you found the procedure to be effective?

Yes.
MidnightSparkle01 wrote:Any other advice, thoughts, or pointers? Thank you!

Just follow the doctor's instructions to the letter.
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Re: Men with vasectomies, your thoughts please

Postby MidnightSparkle01 » Sat May 16, 2015 9:40 pm

Thank you all so much for your answers. I almost think I needed more reassurance about this than my DH. We want to spend a little more time in prayer to be sure, but I am thankful all my questions about the procedure have been answered!

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Re: Men with vasectomies, your thoughts please

Postby wheatie » Mon Nov 02, 2015 10:01 am

Thanks for the all the comments on this topic. They are helpful. I actually have very low tolerance of pain and not to mention pain coming from something very sensitive... is there anyway to decrease the pain to the minimal? Do different doctors make a difference? can you request some sort of anesthesia before the actually anesthesia is given? :o

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Re: Men with vasectomies, your thoughts please

Postby themrs » Mon Apr 04, 2016 6:09 am

wheatie wrote:Thanks for the all the comments on this topic. They are helpful. I actually have very low tolerance of pain and not to mention pain coming from something very sensitive... is there anyway to decrease the pain to the minimal? Do different doctors make a difference? can you request some sort of anesthesia before the actually anesthesia is given? :o


My DH (a member here but not likely to post) had a newer vasectomy technique done. I think it was called scalpel-less. I was with him in the procedure room and he wasn't in any pain. Recovery was not bad.

1. Do you regret having a vasectomy?
No,he does not regret it.

2. Does the pain eventually go away?
Yes! His scalpel-less vasectomy had a short recovery time.

3. Is sex as good for you as it was before?
Yes. Probably better since we don't have to have me on the pill (libido killing) or him putting on a condom in the middle of fun times.

4. Have you found the procedure to be effective?
Yep. The key is to make sure you use protection until you send a semen sample back to the doctor and he tests it to be sure there aren't still any sperm getting through. We did the post-procedure check and got the "all clear" from the dr.

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Re: Men with vasectomies, your thoughts please

Postby jsaw » Mon Apr 04, 2016 6:33 pm

No regrets about having it done, and no negative results, Not much pain.

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Re: Men with vasectomies, your thoughts please

Postby themr » Mon Apr 04, 2016 7:03 pm

no regrets, very little pain after managed by ibuprofen for about a week or so

Our sex is better than ever. No worries of an un planned pregnancy.
Last edited by themr on Sun Apr 10, 2016 5:52 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Men with vasectomies, your thoughts please

Postby wyseguy » Tue Apr 05, 2016 2:32 pm

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:1. Do you regret having a vasectomy?


No.

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:2. Does the pain eventually go away?


I got mine on a Thursday morning and took it very easy. Thursday night, I took one of the vicodin they gave me for pain to insure a good night's sleep (the only one I took). Friday, I took it easy and was pretty tender but if I left the boys alone, they weren't painful. Saturday was less tenderness and I was moving around the house some. Sunday I stayed home as a precaution as there was still a little tenderness when I walked. Monday morning was back to work walking at about 75%. Within a week, I was back to 100% though showering meant washing a little more delicately.

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:3. Is sex as good for you as it was before?


Paranoid until I tested all clear, after that...much better. No more worrying about getting DW pregnant (she has health concerns). Sperm makes up a very small amount of the total volume of an ejaculation, DW didn't notice any difference aside from not getting pregnant.

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:4. Have you found the procedure to be effective?


So far so good. Mine was done 4 years ago.

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:Any other advice, thoughts, or pointers? Thank you!


Do not spring for the variation of the surgery with no needles or scalpels. It is a gimmick. Instead of the scalpel, the surgeon uses the same pair of, well needle-nose pliers, used to clamp the vas deferens to puncture the scrotum (think puncture instead of a clean incision). Instead of the syringe, he uses a kind of spray (think hyposprays on Star Trek). They are more expensive and deliver less effective pain relief.

The procedure itself wasn't anywhere near as bad as I had built up in my mind that it would be. The absolute worst pain of the entire procedure was when they removed the grounding pad for the cauterizing tool. The adhesive stuck to the hair on my leg. Other than that, you feel the initial injection of the anesthetic for which I've had mosquito bites more painful and then when the tugging you feel down there starts to border on the painful, just tell the doctor and he'll hit you with a bit more of the anesthetic.

Follow the doctor's orders on recovery. I've heard of guys who went out the next day to split and stack wood only to end up back in the urologist's office dealing with complications. No need to be a hero. Let your body heal and you'll be back to 100% in no time.

Buy two athletic supporters and be prepared to throw them away. Wear them instead of underwear through the first 72 hours. Ask your wife for a little spoiling for that time. Finally, buy two packages of frozen peas (we affectionately nicknamed them the "testi-peas") and use those instead of ice. One pack goes on the boys, the other is in the freezer. The peas are smaller and can surround the boys a bit better than a plastic bag full of ice. Additionally, the peas don't melt and don't make a mess. A nice pair of shorts will keep them in place while you binge watch Netflix.

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Re: Men who had a vasectomy, your thoughts please

Postby MisterV » Sun Feb 05, 2017 2:42 pm

Thanks for the comments. I/we are considering me getting one. DW is done with having kids, and while she's on the pill I notice that things bug her - having to take it at a fixed time around a highly variable kids' schedule, and a few side effects from the hormones. I'm a little worried about long-term, while they haven't found anything about the pill messing with hormones can be dicey.
For some reason my wife is a little unsure about me getting one. I explained that it's a bit different than having an animal neutered, but she's still a bit unsure.

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Re: Men who had a vasectomy, your thoughts please

Postby justsomeguy » Mon Feb 06, 2017 9:29 pm

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:1. Do you regret having a vasectomy?

Yes. I experienced about 18 months of sharp pain at O. This did a number on my brain as it began associating O with pain.

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:2. Does the pain eventually go away?

In my case, the stabbing pain subsided after 18 months and is now gone (praise God!)

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:3. Is sex as good for you as it was before?

I have not felt the same ever since.

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:4. Have you found the procedure to be effective?

Well my wife hasn't gotten preggo, so I guess? lol

MidnightSparkle01 wrote:Any other advice, thoughts, or pointers?

Just be aware that there is a non-zero percentage of men who have complications. Some men have had greater complications than me.

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Re: Men who had a vasectomy, your thoughts please

Postby TJC » Wed Feb 08, 2017 9:47 am

I had mine done about 25 years ago. Actually had to have it done twice. The first one was relatively painless. The second time let's just say they were a little more aggressive. Since then my right testicle has always been more sensitive to pain if I'm on my feet too much. Until I started taking an arginine and citrulline supplement, orgasms were also slightly painful. I found this out about the supplement by accident, as I started taking the supplement as a pre-workout supplement to boost my testosterone levels.
At the time I was conflicted as to whether it was right to have it done. In the end, I went through with it because it was important to DW. We had seven children over the course of 15 years, which included a separation of five years, so she was very fertile! :roll: We used to tell everyone that we had a child for every form of birth control that was non- surgical. :lol:
I had it done right after my youngest son was born, so yes, I would say it was effective. Would I do it again? I honestly don't know. I still wonder if it was right sometimes. I rely on grace to cover it if it was wrong, but I really have no confidence that it was a good decision on my part. At the time it was considered to be non-reversible, so it's a little different from today. I understand that now they can reverse the procedure with limited success.
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Re: Men who had a vasectomy, your thoughts please

Postby slowandsteady » Wed Feb 08, 2017 3:43 pm

I had it done about 6 months ago with no issues. A couple days of pain, a couple days of moving slow, and by about a week, I was pretty well back to normal. I haven't noticed any difference in sex.

After 5 kids, we were both ready, and neither one of us has had any second thoughts about it.

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Re: Men with vasectomies, your thoughts please

Postby cmur7994 » Fri Feb 10, 2017 2:44 pm

1. Do you regret having a vasectomy?
No, not at all.

2. Does the pain eventually go away?
I'm one of the 1% or so that had some type of reaction. After the initial incision pain went away, I had some tenderness in my scrotum periodically. Talked to the doctor about it and he said it would go away when I ejaculate. He was right. Funny story, I asked him to write a script for more orgasms, and he did! I hope I have that somewhere, it was a fun gag on my wife. But seriously, I "needed" to ejaculate to get rid of the pain/tenderness. That completely went away after about 5 years.

3. Is sex as good for you as it was before?
Yes, don't notice a difference. We still use condoms on occasion, but the peace of mind/spontaneity is a big plus. Wife actually went back to oral contraceptives ~ 10 years later, because of PMS type issues. Still no regrets, though.

4. Have you found the procedure to be effective?
Yes!

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Re: Men who had a vasectomy, your thoughts please

Postby GuyNamedSteve » Sat Apr 15, 2017 2:54 pm

For those that had this procedure done, did you notice any changes in the consistence of your ejaculate?

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Re: Men who had a vasectomy, your thoughts please

Postby George B. » Sat Apr 15, 2017 4:14 pm

None at all. It was exactly the same as before--same amount and consistency.
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