Tigger wrote:He is saying God has not helped him even though he has prayed in the past. I keep begging God to do something and it feels like He hasn't. At least DH has agreed to counseling next week.
Many times people will think or say "Yeah, I tried that God thing. If He's there He's not answering my prayers." But in fact, there is more to asking God's help than just praying a few times. God expects us to do the work needed as well. This involves practical work and spiritual discipline and faithfulness. Some of the spiritual disciplines and options include,
1. Prayer, daily, intense prayer.
2. Fellowship, with like-minded and mature believers, faithfully, frequently
3. Assembling together, i.e. going to Church, weekly, twice a week, faithfully to the same church, not church-hopping, not moving around, not staying away for weeks or months at a time, even for "good" reasons.
4. Education -- reading the right books about the topic, listening to talks and sermons online by competent teachers and experts
5. Counseling -- getting good In Real Life counseling from wise men, not just free, anonymous internet counsel on a forum
6. Sacrifice 1 -- giving up privacy and allowing internet filters and accountability reports
7. Sacrifice 2 -- for a porn addict to get a computer and a private office, in a secluded place is a really foolish idea, even if it is to start a business to support your family. It is better to get a lower paying job, and eat beans and rice instead of steak.
Tigger wrote:I love him and it really sounds like he is trying but I just can't reconcile being okay with the levels thing. Is it too harsh for me to ask him for complete purity?
No. It is not too harsh to expect and require complete, 100% purity from him. But it may be unrealistic, and you should be prepared for that.
One last thing Tigger; you mentioned "leaving." For anyone who has these thoughts, and is a relative newlywed and still childless, I generally have this admonition ... Do not conceive a child with this man until you are convinced that he has been totally, 100% healed of this addiction for at least one solid year without a single relapse.
Wanting to become like Job, as described in the Bible, the book of Job chapter 29. Hence the screen name.