Sigh.

[Unfulfilled]

DW prescription bottle still listed the manufacturer as: Forrest Labs. Which I think is the old name. But she is stil experiencing symptoms as if it is not as effective.

[southerngent]

Unfulfilled,

Call the pharmacy (or get DW to do so). If they received a refill and she was set up in the computer, just because the manufacturer changed would not mean that pharmacy changed it in their patient file in the computer.

[Nvr2Late]

I'm sorry if you mentioned this, but how often is she getting her thyroid labs checked? Her dose may not be enough now. If she has Hashimotos, as I do, her needed dose can fluctuate depending on how hard the gland is being attacked. Then that's a whole 'nother situation. There are really lots of things to consider.

[Unfulfilled]

^^^^

I assume you are referring to me.

My wife gets tested approximately every Few months. Just last test was end of August.

She has hashi's but the Dr's think her thyroid gland is already well past dead and producing nothing. Anymore. Her last test showed an increase in TSH and a decrease in free T4. And we were extremely disappointed that Free T3 was not tested as we have demanded that both free's be tested every time! This resulted in a bump up of Armour from 2.75 grains to 3 grains. And she is even more tired and fatigued now and is also complaining of being cold than she was back in August. Of course it is winter time so being cold is t that terribly uncommon situation.

My wife does not feel well until her TSH is suppressed. We had felt we were zeroing in on optimization when all this seemed to go haywire!

My wife also has low T that the Dr's and my wife want to do nothing about. Her estrogen is not very high either.m and we wonder why she has no sex drive. Hormonally it seems pretty clear why that would be so!

[MrsTom]

Our night away just sort of vanished. Bother.

MIL came to visit, but we didn't feel we could ask her to stay with the kids. She's not the most involved grandparent in spite of the fact that she's the only one my kids have and she only has my kids for grands. Bother.

So much for progress.

[MrsTom]

Romance leads to wanting to have sex with the object of your affection.

Biology leads to wanting to have sex with your spouse because they are available.

Discuss?

[Guybrush]

Romance must be the vehicle we use to get our biological needs to be met.

[Vanna]

^^^ LOL my favorite cat just went into heat for her first time- wow- she's nuts... if I could bottle that and sell it I'd be rich beyond comprehension. If only it were that simple: one-a-day now fortified with vitamin sex. Left to biology, I'm not certain monogamy would be where our flesh would go just to scratch an itch. The biology part is simple, it's the relationship part that complicates it.

[Drob]

Romance satisfies the heart
Biology satisfied an itch

Sent from my XT1060 using Tapatalk

[Unfulfilled]

Romance brings joy. Joy is spiritual and fulfills and is sustaining

Biology brings pleasure. Pleasure is physical and fleeting.

[MrsTom]

Left to biology, I'm not certain monogamy would be where our flesh would go just to scratch an itch. The biology part is simple, it's the relationship part that complicates it.

Don't get me wrong, I'm in favor of the "confines of marriage" that do not condone scratching one's itches outside its bounds. I would like to feel like more than a convenience, a given, an expectation.

[SeekingChange]

I like the idea of romance from a distance.... not so much up close.

Biology is much safer.

All of this in the context as an avoider of emotions. (Thanks Vanna )

[blondie]

It's wonderful to have someone available whom you love after trying to keep pure for so many years.

[doug-h]

I tend to disagree with both statements.

Maybe it's just a question of semantics, but it may be a difference between the way a man and woman are wired.

Romance doesn't create a desire in me, but in fact, just the opposite occurs. Desiring sex with the object of my affection leads me to be romantic.

Biology leads me to desire sex. Period, end of statement.
Comitment directs that desire towards my spouse.

[OldBear]

Romance focuses on the journey.

Biology is intent on the destination.

[jokerman]

How do these definitions assist our understanding of marriage and relationships?

The biology definition in the OP is probably true but it would only apply to an animal, I would think. Human biology is attached to a reasoning brain and a spirit, and thus sexuality must be expressed in socially appropriate ways. Romance is one of those rituals that must be present at some level (at the very least, we must be somewhat kind to our partner and have implicit or explicit consent) so that sex is seen as civilized.

[FoxluvsBunnyDFC]

Romance satisfies the heart
Biology satisfied an itch

Sent from my XT1060 using Tapatalk

Yes... Sex is definitely both. It fills those two needs one at times more than others depending on what i need at the given time.

At the same time i have a biological craving for sex but only w dh because i have a romantic connection. Thats why if im in the mood i think of dh and crave when we can be together and dony seek out joe shmoe to go have sex w on the street. We arent animals and i think the romance piece sets us apart from animals sexually. Animals have the biological need buy not the important romantic piece that makes human sex beautiful and civilized. The cool thing is the romantic craving leads to better meeting of the biological craving and vosa versa.. Its all intimately connected in humans in the context of marriage. God really knew what He was doing making sex a part of marriage

[txtwindad]

The OP is a false dichotomy. Biology and romance are intricately linked. In a healthy relationship, romance leads to sex and sex leads to romance. The biology binds us and creates the kind of bonds that lead to increased intimacy and more sex and romance.

If you are feeling like you are being taken advantage of, I get that. But the problem is not biology. The problem is either which your relationship, your spouse, or yourself. And likely all three. Concentrate on yourself first as that is the only thing you can change, followed by your relationship and your spouse. Work on very clearly telling your spouse what you need. Telling him you need more romance is worthless. Give him specific goals, tasks, assignments. If he refuses to try and give you what you need then you need to decide how you proceed.

[MrsTom]

I don't know what to do. We've been down this road many times. Sigh.

I get the "spell it out for him" deal. BTDT more than once. The issues are complicated.

I recently learned a new medical term, "sub-clinical". It means, I think, that you have a condition that is insidious but not readily displayed. Yeah. Our relationship issues are sub-clinical until I bring them up. Just tired.

Yesterday I thought I had a blood clot in my arm. I was driving home from church. I calmly thought, "Well, if this breaks free and goes to my brain, I don't have to deal with this and he's free to find someone who more obviously makes sparks for him." Whatever.

Notice my signature line? I have been hanging on by the thread of believing that my mind is the most desirable part of me. Some days that works for me.

[MrsTom]

Around this issue. I have pcos and body issues. Big changes right after our wedding. I do not have unprompted indications that DH likes any part of me aside from my vagina. I don't expect him to make stuff up. I cope by just focusing on the physical sensations, but sex is not an intimate experience. I suspect he is just fine with it. I, however, am moving out of our bedroom for now. Because this is a recurring issue and I do not trust whatever he says because it obviously is not spontaneous he does not have any great options. He has not planned a date since I can't remember when. We have two kids; youngest is 12.

I am no longer spending any money aside from kids' needs and groceries. I just live here, cook and do household laundry (his personal laundry is his job), and educate the kids. Looking for an evening job soon just to be away at that time. I mentioned it before this came to the fore again and he said it wouldn't really affect him.

We will see how this works out.