Menopause and Emotions

Menopause - how it impacts your health, your sexuality, and your life in general.
MandE
Twin size
Posts: 31
Joined: Sun Jul 10, 2011 2:17 pm
Date of your marriage (past or future): September 8th, 1980
Gender: Male

Menopause and Emotions

Postby MandE » Sun Oct 02, 2011 1:33 pm

So,
About 6 - 8 years ago my was warning me that she is beginning to experience hot flashes and she thinks it is menopause. She was right! One day this countenance of :evil: :evil: came over her and I asked her if anything was wrong. I'm glad she wasn't in the kitchen near the knife block!

Our marriage has survived. She has complained to her OB/GYN that there was no sex drive - not that it was ever what I would call "a drive". Always seemed LD to me. After tests were run she was pronounced healthy and told that lack of sex drive was in her head.

Now we are talking about this with some desire to get to find a solution. She mentioned that she feels "angry" all the time and has bouts of spotting every few months. She is 54. For hormone adjustment she takes Angeliq (0.5 mg drospirenone and 1.0 mg estradiol) once daily.

Is this angry-all-the-time feeling normal? Is it emotional or hormonal? Should we seek counseling first to rule out the emotional side first? I welcome your thoughts.

.

Vanna

Re: Menopause and Emotions

Postby Vanna » Sun Oct 02, 2011 2:38 pm

Menopause can be a real pain in the butt, and can rival some of the worst PMS moodswings out there. Hang in there, it does end after a while. 8)

User avatar
Leah
Under the stars
Posts: 15936
Joined: Mon Feb 20, 2006 6:42 pm
Date of your marriage (past or future): November 3rd, 1979
Gender: Female
Location: The Volunteer State

Re: Menopause and Emotions

Postby Leah » Sun Oct 02, 2011 4:12 pm

I just want to comment on this. I have never been one to think it is all right to give full vent to moodiness. It is fine to feel how I feel, but I do not think misery loves company, and I really do not think company loves misery. If the feelings become too overwhelming, I think we can communicate those feelings in a healthy way, "I'm sorry, I'm feeling very weepy today," "I apologize, I feel on edge. Can we have this discussion in about an hour?" To me, hormones are given way too much credit for the way we behave. I think people should take full responsibility for their own feelings and actions and not use them as reasons to be harsh and rude.
Leah

“I have learned now that while those who speak about one's miseries usually hurt, those who keep silence hurt more.”--C.S. Lewis


TMB Copyright and Fair Use

younggm

Re: Menopause and Emotions

Postby younggm » Sun Oct 02, 2011 7:12 pm

You may want to encourage your wife to find someone who will test her individual hormone levels if she has not already done so. The problem with traditional HRT is that is can be a one fits all approach. Often the HRT addresses low estrogen levels. For many woman, i was one, the problem is the other hormones are too low which causes them to be estrogen dominate. Giving them the traditional HRT only makes the symptoms worse. Menopause is complicated and every woman is different and needs to be treated that way. I found a doctor who did the individual hormone testing and am being treated with bio-identical hormones, the combination is based on my individual needs. It has not been an easy process and has taken me a while to find a good balance. I have also had to pay out of pocket for it as my HMO will not cover it. But it has helped where as the HMO's treatments made me worse.

Good Luck! I feel for you! And trust me she is not having a good time as is reflected in her moods.

User avatar
Gemma
Under the stars
Posts: 3955
Joined: Fri Dec 29, 2006 4:21 pm
Date of your marriage (past or future): February 14th, 1981
Gender: Female
Location: West Michigan

Re: Menopause and Emotions

Postby Gemma » Mon Oct 03, 2011 4:45 am

Leah in Mid-South wrote:I just want to comment on this. I have never been one to think it is all right to give full vent to moodiness. It is fine to feel how I feel, but I do not think misery loves company, and I really do not think company loves misery. If the feelings become too overwhelming, I think we can communicate those feelings in a healthy way, "I'm sorry, I'm feeling very weepy today," "I apologize, I feel on edge. Can we have this discussion in about an hour?" To me, hormones are given way too much credit for the way we behave. I think people should take full responsibility for their own feelings and actions and not use them as reasons to be harsh and rude.


Nodding in total agreement.
Gemma~ refuser for 25yrs, awakened since Dec 2006!
passionwithinmarriage.blogspot.com

There'll be no locks or bolts between us, Mary Kate... except those in your own mercenary little heart! (Thornton in The Quiet Man)

MandE
Twin size
Posts: 31
Joined: Sun Jul 10, 2011 2:17 pm
Date of your marriage (past or future): September 8th, 1980
Gender: Male

Re: Menopause and Emotions

Postby MandE » Mon Oct 03, 2011 1:51 pm

Leah in Mid-South,
To be fair, I may have overstated her countenance with the :evil: :evil:. Probably should have been :x instead. That was years ago. Recently I was surprised by "angry" (her word) on how she feels at times. She keeps her emotions in check and is never harsh or rude.

younggm,
We have no endocrinologists in our town. Seventy miles to the closest. As you know there are many types of endos. The specialty that matched closest was reproductive endocrinologist. Does that make sense or should she get a referral from her OB/GYN?

User avatar
Leah
Under the stars
Posts: 15936
Joined: Mon Feb 20, 2006 6:42 pm
Date of your marriage (past or future): November 3rd, 1979
Gender: Female
Location: The Volunteer State

Re: Menopause and Emotions

Postby Leah » Tue Oct 04, 2011 4:28 am

MandE wrote:Leah in Mid-South,
To be fair, I may have overstated her countenance with the :evil: :evil:. Probably should have been :x instead. That was years ago. Recently I was surprised by "angry" (her word) on how she feels at times. She keeps her emotions in check and is never harsh or rude.



I was speaking generally. A lot of women use hormones as an excuse not to demonstrate the fruit of self-control.
Leah

“I have learned now that while those who speak about one's miseries usually hurt, those who keep silence hurt more.”--C.S. Lewis


TMB Copyright and Fair Use

younggm

Re: Menopause and Emotions

Postby younggm » Tue Oct 04, 2011 5:45 pm

Try to Google "Doctors who prescribe bio-identical hormones and your city and state".

More and more doctors are doing the testing, a lot of the are ob/gyns. I have a friend that found a nurse practitioner that does it. I don't have any experience with endocrinologist, so don't know if they will or will not do it. My ob/gyn would not do the testing or the bio-identical hormones, so I went through a company called BodyLogicMD. I have to pay out of pocket and it's not cheap, so if you can find one under your insurance, all the better. The testing costs me about $300 and at first I had to repeat them every 3 months until we got a good balance. Now I re-test every 6 months. The hormones cost me about $150 a month. Yeah I know - not cheap. But for me personally, worth every penny.

Research this topic, google testing hormones levels in women and google bio-identical hormones. Alot of the sites you will find are business sites selling this stuff. It has become a big dollar business, so be wary. Look for articles and just read the info on the sites. Weed out the advertising and read all you can find and see what you think. You can try to discuss it with your doctor. My experience is the younger doctors are very open to these concepts, but the older doctors are not at all open to it and in fact will tell you how bad they think it is.

As far as menopause is concerned, there is a good site that I found that talks a lot about it. It is a sight that sells natural remedies for menopause, but they also have an informative section with a lot of different articles on just about everything that affects us middle aged women. Google "women to women". They have an article on talking to your doctor about bio-identical hormones. I will try to post this link but don't think this site will let me. The testing of the individual hormones and doing bio-identical hormones is controversial. Google it and do some research and readings about it. See what you think. It just made so much sense to me.

http://www.womentowomen.com/bioidentica ... octor.aspx

MandE
Twin size
Posts: 31
Joined: Sun Jul 10, 2011 2:17 pm
Date of your marriage (past or future): September 8th, 1980
Gender: Male

Re: Menopause and Emotions

Postby MandE » Wed Oct 05, 2011 2:02 pm

Thank you younggm,
The site had good suggestions, especially on how to approach a physician about testing. Their holistic approach may have validity for some We are not that confident in them.

We talked yesterday about seeking more hormone replacement therapy. She reminded me of the thrombosis she experienced in her legs and the pap smear a two years ago that was suspicious. With this history she does not want to risk that something more serious could develop. At this point I don't see us going for the full hormone work up.

Good luck in your journey to balanced hormones!

M


Return to “Menopause”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users