Sex after 50

Aging brings changes - some good, some not so much.
sambo
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Sex after 50

Postby sambo » Tue Aug 09, 2011 7:33 am

I just want to say that I wish as newlyweds you could know how wonderful your sex life can be later on. I had always heard that as you get older your sex drive will diminish, and I thought "wow, that would make it be like what, zero??" But thankfully after our DC are both now out on their own, and I have retired from my stressful job, DH and I have found that we really really enjoy being with each other and the sex has gotten so much better. I work to try to find new ways to please him while looking for ways to enjoy more myself. As my OB/GYN says, "you should never go away from the experience feeling deprived" and he has helped me with hormone therapy since going through menopause that has really helped. I think it is so wonderful that you don't have to be a teen or newlywed or under 30 to have great sex, and it's really sexy to be able to look at each other when out somewhere with that "knowing smile" of a secret that the two or you share. LOVING LIFE these days!!! :D :D :D :D
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AkMike
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Re: Sex after 50

Postby AkMike » Tue Aug 09, 2011 7:43 am

I agree wholeheartedly. It's gotten better, the older DW and I have gotten. Not easier, in some ways, but definitely better. In my mid-fifties, I no longer have anything to "prove" sexually, and can just enjoy being with my wife. Orgasms are still great, if a little challenging at times, but sex is no longer the compartmentalized thing it was when we were younger. Now, it's the whole experience--physical, emotional, spiritual--and wow! I'm just amazed at how good it can be.

Praise God!

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luvmygirls
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Re: Sex after 50

Postby luvmygirls » Tue Aug 09, 2011 7:52 am

Cool!

Last week DW and I were talking because we had just spent a week with her parents. Her mom made a comment, pretty much saying that "that is just how things are" when you get older, meaning don't have to share a bed or flirt with each other, and also indicating that sex falls off the table. I made a comment about it when were driving somewhere and she smiled and said, "So are you still going to be kinky with me when we get old?"

"Always."

It's good to have a bride who has bucked her parents' skewed perspective. On the other side, my father is 71 and just had prostate cancer and treatment. On one of his follow ups as he was getting clearance, he asked the doctor about how this would affect "intimacy" and what could be done to maintain it. I just thought it was cool that he was thinking about that.
"If you have any poo, fling it now."--monkey from "Madagascar"

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lovemykitty
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Re: Sex after 50

Postby lovemykitty » Tue Aug 09, 2011 8:10 am

We're not quite 50 yet (DH is close) and although we have struggled with frequency and desire, I can honestly say that sex now is better than it ever was when we were newlyweds and young marrieds. I look forward to the next ten years as kids move out of the house and we have more freedom to explore our intimacy together.

Oklahoma
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Re: Sex after 50

Postby Oklahoma » Tue Aug 09, 2011 9:57 am

We both past 50 a while ago.....just keeps getting better!

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Job29Man
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Re: Sex after 50

Postby Job29Man » Tue Aug 09, 2011 8:42 pm

Dittos. Both past 50 and wrecking the sheets real fine. :wink:
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Legolas
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Re: Sex after 50

Postby Legolas » Wed Aug 10, 2011 4:14 pm

We're just at the 50 mark now, both DD's leaving for school "far away" in three weeks...going to be a little tough on DW trying to figure out who she is and what her purpose is in the house from this point on, but we are both "really" looking forward to the whole package, nekid runs to the bathroom, and no one to hear how loud we want to be; yep really looking forward to it all. WootWoot!!!
"A limit on what you will do puts a limit on what you can do". John Maxwell

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texashubby
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Re: Sex after 50

Postby texashubby » Wed Aug 10, 2011 6:17 pm

At my last annual physical, my physician suggest a drug to help control nerve induced pain.

I asked if it would inhibit libido.
The doc said "Yes!"

I responded that wasn't interested in the drug.

While it may take longer to O and I am limited to one-a-day, the quality ::spin of the Os have never been better. O's when younger were centered in the frenulum. Now they are a whole body experience. (I don't know if this makes sense but I can tell the difference and the difference is major.)

DW as a teenager using a vibrator could O several times in succession (short but sweet).

Now she's a one and done with her Magic Wand. The difference with maturity, she spends minutes at the top on the mountain. I have timed her at 10 minutes plus. After the initial strong O she goes into another dimension and just goes on and on. Her usually stops because of an O induced migraine or fatigue.

Threescore & Ten Years going on Eleven

PS Speaking of taking longer...if climbing a mountain was a sprint, would reaching to summit be as rewarding?
Last edited by texashubby on Thu Aug 25, 2011 5:21 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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overtherainbow
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Re: Sex after 50

Postby overtherainbow » Thu Aug 11, 2011 4:12 pm

We're both over 50 and amen the posts already made in relation to the quality of sex now. We spent last winter in an empty nest, but the kids are drifting back again! Not complaining, but we've had to re-adjust back again.

DW is approaching menopause, and is frustrated that no matter how she looks after her diet, the pounds are clinging to her middle. I love her shape, but she finds it more and more difficult to feel sexy, just because of what she sees in the mirror. She also has very sore feet which the doctors can't find any cause for.

Anyone got some good advice for how I can better support and help her to navigate this time of change? What are the key things I can do to boost her confidence? I tell her lots and lots that she's really attractive (which is true) and write her notes etc. She likes me saying that, but still struggles to believe it. Is it likely that she can shed the extra weight? Not that it matters to me, but it does to her.

Thanks.
"It is not sex that gives the pleasure, but the lover". Marge Piercy
Sex & relationship advice for over 50s:
http://willyoustill.com

firefly
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Re: Sex after 50

Postby firefly » Sat Aug 13, 2011 8:20 am

Wife and I are both past 50 and love the closeness that comes each time we have sex. When we were much younger, sex was daily and many times just that, sex. Then the wife's libido just dropped off and we moved on to a vibrator to get her cranked up each time. We still have sex just to have sex, but we enjoy our intimate talks and holding one another more and more, before and after sex. Our children are leaving for college also, some men at church ask, "what ya going to do after the girls are gone?" Answer: "Run around naked and have sex as often as possible with no restraints". Some look at me with a smile and say, "whatever floats your boat", others say, "yea buddy, thats what I'm talking about".
36 years of life with the one I love and cherish. Growing in grace, and loving our children.

happilymarriedhubby
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Re: Sex after 50

Postby happilymarriedhubby » Sat Aug 13, 2011 9:13 am

Glad to hear all the positives from everyone about your love life as you get older. We're not there yet, but the DW defintly has grown in to a more mature role enjoying our LM more and the only issue I've gained is a longer recovery period of about an hour (and we really don't need to do it more than 20 time a day anyway :D )

it sounds like any worries I have about getting older in regrads to LM are only fantasies created by the media!

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overtherainbow
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Re: Sex after 50

Postby overtherainbow » Sat Aug 13, 2011 2:59 pm

Here's an interesting site for sex and relationships after 50: http://willyoustill.com
"It is not sex that gives the pleasure, but the lover". Marge Piercy
Sex & relationship advice for over 50s:
http://willyoustill.com


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