RE: Womans Needs

Aging brings changes - some good, some not so much.
rediron
King bed
Posts: 328
Joined: Fri Mar 10, 2006 12:16 am
Date of your marriage (past or future): August 11th, 1984
Gender: Male

RE: Womans Needs

Postby rediron » Tue Apr 30, 2013 5:12 pm

Hi Gang;
I did not want to further hijack the previous topic, so I started this. I am in my upper 50's, DW is upper 40's. She is perimenopausal, and quite LD. There has been some talk here of ED (which I have), and treatments - most of which I cannot take or cannot afford.
When we have PIV sex, it is without erection, or a partial. We "stuff".
I love DW, and have always been quite a sexual man. I love giving her pleasure, and do so manually with great delight (we do not do OS at this time). While the penetration sex is not as good as it used to be, I try to pleasure her completely, and am willing to take all the time in the world.
Some questions, along the same lines as some expressed in the previous thread. She is LD. Could take it or leave it. I have had a porn problem, not blaming her, but the refusal and regection sure did not help any. She recently stated that she was willing to schedule sex. Sex at this point in life generally means manual for her, as good as I can make it and as long as she can take it. PIV, then I finish myself manually.
Through the years, I received little or no sexual touch from her (totally passive), but I love pleasing her / making her orgasm, that while it hurts, it isn't that bad (The rejection of refusal IS that bad when it occurs). I may have ED on the outside, but I am hard as a rock on the inside and raring to go. I will let my fingers do the walking, baby.
Now the questions.

1.) The only real route open to me now is a penis pump, and [penis] ring. I am trying to find the funds for this - anyone had success?

2.) Any way to interest her more? As OML said, sometimes there is no reaction to a sexually charged question, as the LD person is kind of sexually numb. Been there with her, done that, got the hoodie, and the monogrammed luggage.

3.) With reference to 2.), I would like to entice her to touch me (spent the last 29 years figuring out how to turn her inside out, would love some reciprocation / involvement)

4.) Since (as OML states), most women desire penetration after manual / oral, I have considered buying a strap on of approximately the same size as I was / am. She has no interest (she says - says that she can still feel me inside), but I have thought of it, because we used to have bangin' PIV - even if it was not as frequent as I would have liked. I miss that, but am concerned that I would be giving her something that I cannot naturally produce any more (I loved the sight of her orgasming during PIV).

5.) Would you still like sex with a man who desires you intensely, can turn you inside out manually, and loves you deeply, even if ED?

Comments Questions and (as one poster says "If you have any poo, fling it now."
Later
Rediron
Romance, flowers and nice suprises are high interest bearing accounts.

User avatar
OldMarriedLady
Under the stars
Posts: 5389
Joined: Fri Feb 19, 2010 6:01 pm
Date of your marriage (past or future): May 7th, 1983
Gender: Female

Re: RE: RE: Womans Needs

Postby OldMarriedLady » Tue Apr 30, 2013 5:42 pm

rediron wrote:1.) The only real route open to me now is a penis pump, and c-ring. I am trying to find the funds for this - anyone had success?

Have you seen this thread about a penile device that our board czar Dale has tested and heartily approves of? He also has negotiated a lower price on this device for TMB members. You might want to check that out.
rediron wrote:4.) Since (as OML states), most women desire penetration after manual / oral,

I went back and looked at the other thread, and I didn't state that most women desire this - I stated that *I* desired it. I surely can't speak for most women.
"When you love them, they drive you crazy - because they know they can."
(From the 1987 movie "Moonstruck", written by John Patrick Shanley)

User avatar
seeking perspective
Under the stars
Posts: 5566
Joined: Sun Sep 05, 2010 8:01 am
Date of your marriage (past or future): April 27th, 1991
Gender: Female
Location: between the Northwoods and the Great Plains and the Great Lakes
Contact:

Re: RE: RE: Womans Needs

Postby seeking perspective » Tue Apr 30, 2013 5:59 pm

My husband and I are both nearly 50. He does experience ED--not all the time, but enough that it's become something we have to think ahead about.

rediron wrote:1.) The only real route open to me now is a penis pump, and [edit] ring. I am trying to find the funds for this - anyone had success?

Nope, but we are looking at the Erektor that Dale posted about the other day.

2.) Any way to interest her more? As OML said, sometimes there is no reaction to a sexually charged question, as the LD person is kind of sexually numb. Been there with her, done that, got the hoodie, and the monogrammed luggage.


3.) With reference to 2.), I would like to entice her to touch me (spent the last 29 years figuring out how to turn her inside out, would love some reciprocation / involvement)

Does your wife have any interest in changing? I spent a lot of years sexually resistant and unwilling to touch my husband. That changed when I determined that we were both unhappy and I made an effort to do some things differently. Until I was ready for my heart to change, though, I don't know that anything could've convinced me to act differently.

4.) Since (as OML states), most women desire penetration after manual / oral, I have considered buying a strap on of approximately the same size as I was / am. She has no interest (she says - says that she can still feel me inside), but I have thought of it, because we used to have bangin' PIV - even if it was not as frequent as I would have liked. I miss that, but am concerned that I would be giving her something that I cannot naturally produce any more (I loved the sight of her orgasming during PIV).

We have a vibrator that isn't too different in size from my husband, and we do use that sometimes after the ED really kicks in. What matters to me isn't as much whether it's my husband's penis or a toy; it's whether he's involved. Although I would always prefer my husband's penis to the toy, what I really want is to have him touching me and helping me reach orgasm. What matters to me most is his participation and his understanding that I like to be filled.

5.) Would you still like sex with a man who desires you intensely, can turn you inside out manually, and loves you deeply, even if ED?

Yup. When he is having his ED issues, it becomes even more important to him to be able to please me sexually.

But that's just me.
You turned my wailing into dancing . . .
~Psalm 30:11
The Forgiven Wife
and Sex Chat for Christian Wives

rediron
King bed
Posts: 328
Joined: Fri Mar 10, 2006 12:16 am
Date of your marriage (past or future): August 11th, 1984
Gender: Male

Re: RE: RE: Womans Needs

Postby rediron » Tue Apr 30, 2013 6:02 pm

Hi gang;
Sorry OML;did not mean to misquote. I would think it reasonable; and DW has expressed the sentiment. I would like it also. Thanks for the thread link. Still probably couldn't afford it. Maybe I could apply for a scholarship. I would promise to study hard and apply myself completely!
Romance, flowers and nice suprises are high interest bearing accounts.


Return to “Senior Sex”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users